Exer-what?

My doctor said it would be good if I exercised more. Hahahhahaaaahahahahaaaaaaa!

Oh wait, you’re serious? Crap.

I hate exercise. At best, it’s Richard Simmons jumping up and down and being weird. At worst, it’s DEATH – yes, I said it, people actually die from exercise. Probably. Or at least get SO TIRED. And geez I’m already tired. Why do I have to do this? Sigh.

You know what it makes me think of? Gym class in elementary school. Our teacher, I’ll call him Mr. S., was a really scary guy. This was in the 80’s when little kids (even those of us with glasses) were still forced to play dodgeball. They probably only have to do things like yoga now. I always dreaded gym, because he yelled at us that we were lazy, and made us do laps, and the bigger kids (with better aim) always targeted kids like me with those stupid rubber balls. Also, we had that national physical fitness thing that President Regan started (I’m sure my facts on this are fuzzy) so I recall having to run a mile and do as many situps as I could. It just seemed like this weird form of torture, with absolutely no point. Blech. Don’t even get me started on having to change in the locker room.

Have I mentioned that I am really, really clumsy?

Also, I got in trouble in gym a lot because I would get extremely distracted, which is not a good quality when playing a team sport. I would regularly miss the ball during softball because I was looking for four-leaf clovers in the field, or get hit with the volleyball because I was staring into space.

In hindsight, I could have had it worse – my husband’s school actually had gym uniforms. That gives me the creeps. Not only were they – I’m sure – horribly unflattering, but just thinking about possibly getting lice or other ickies – ew, ew, ew, ew, ew.

Anyway, though, my point is that I don’t have the best view of exercise. But I do it. I mean, I do about 20 minutes of yoga stretches every morning, and I walk as much as I can. But when the doc asked me when’s the last time I got hot & sweaty, (and I know that was not meant in the fun way,) I just couldn’t remember. Maybe jumping on the playground with my daughter? I dunno.

I mean, exercise isn’t all bad. I know that it can help relieve my stress, and I know that it can make me healthier. Maybe help make me look good too, if I do it enough. It’s just so haaaaaard to get into it. (whine) Hard to find the time, the energy.

So, my husband and I decided to have a bike riding date. However, see above mention of clumsiness. It’s really bad. Yes, I know how to ride a bike. In the same way that I know how to, say, win the World Series or finish a triathlon. I could probably tell you how, but can I do it myself? Doubtful.

He bought me a bike back a few years ago as a birthday present. Unfortunately, two things happened that kept me from riding it – 1) it was kind of uncomfortable, so I didn’t want to ride it. It was a speed bike type bike, and when I sit on it I pitch forward, so a lot of pressure is on my wrists. As you know joint pain is a big issue for me with my Crohn’s. And 2) I got pregnant (yay!) and my doctor said no bike riding. Not because pregnant women can’t ride bikes, but because clumsy pregnant women can’t ride bikes.

So, it’s been a while since I’ve been on a bike, but I still have hope. While looking around for an inexpensive tricycle for my daughter, I spotted this bike on CraigsList.

Cute! And you know what? I bought it. Because I found it to be a comfortable ride, and it’s already beat up so it’s fine if I fall. Then I scheduled the sitter to come for a few hours this Sunday afternoon.

It’s not a marathon, and it’s not Sweatin’ to the Oldies, but it is exercise, and I think it may actually be fun.

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2 responses »

  1. I have a few comments:
    1. We are so different.
    2. You could finish a triathlon with the proper training, absolutely.
    3. Elementary school gym class WAS torture.
    4. Yay have fun on your bike ride, dont forget to wear a helmet!

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